Moving Our Priorities Beyond First, Second, Third

From time to time we all think about priorities. Usually when life is getting a little out of control and we know something is going to have to give. When we think of priorities we often think in terms of “rank.”

Let’s say, for conversation’s sake, we have a husband (Steve) who is trying to get his time priorities back in line. He knows he wants to love God will all of his heart, soul, mind, and strength by managing his relationships and activities in biblical manner (the charts below are Steve’s attempt to determine what loving God looks like in practice). So he sits down and lists his priorities and ranks them. He creates something that looks like Chart 1.

This is good chart. Most of us would applaud Steve for having things in the right order. However, there is a false assumption embedded in the chart. When we prioritize things by rank we often assume each item is equidistant from those things above and below it. In Steve’s case, we would assume the “value” score (out of a total of 100) would look like Chart 2.

If this were the case, Steve would spend twice as much time with his wife as he does at work and three times as much time with the kids as he does working on the house. He would have spent significantly more time renovating his house by opting for things like swimming pool remodeling, which would have increased the value of his home for the future if he ever wanted to sell it. This is why we stopped making priority lists. Life simply refuses to cooperate, and the list never appears to be feasible.

The list will always be sort of dynamic rather than a full and final picture of Steve’s priorities. Taking the previous home improvement example again-Steve would definitely spend a lot more time on his house and related aspects than with his wife or kids, if they were in the process of selling the house. He would have a number of other duties such as looking for a reliable realtor or a company offering such services as buying for cash (like what Crawford Home Buyers – https://webuyhousesinatlanta.com/ – do); searching for a different home to live in; speaking with interested buyers; and so on. This tedious process would then make Steve’s number 1 priority, his home.

I believe it is more accurate and effective to conceptualize our priorities in terms of a “value rank” system. Steve would still list his key relationships and activities. However, before ranking them he would assign them a value based on a total 100 score. From these value scores, Steve would then identify the rank of each item and seek to manage his life accordingly. This would look like Chart 3.

Whether you agree with the numbers or not, please follow the concept. There are varying distances between successive ranks. If we added more items, then the difference in value would become more pronounced. We could make it a bit more complex by discussing how work is a way Steve provides for his wife and kids, but we won’t go there now. We will seek to make two points of application.

First, we will look at how value scoring changes the way we think about sin. Let’s say in Steve’s stress, he takes up internet gambling. Now, online casinos (head to paybyphonecasino.uk or similar pages to find some) can have a lot of benefits. They can be fun, a good way to keep in touch with friends, and maybe even earn some extra money on the side.

However, anything in excess can be very harmful. Also, while playing games in an online casino, he may have to be careful while spending a considerable amount of money on them. Moreover, he can look for offers like Mega Moolah $1 deposit 2022 (or any similar one) to generate a side income as well as to control the excessive spending over gambling and casino. Further, in Steve’s case, he is spending time and money that should be devoted to the family on his new “hobby.” Steve is also gambling at work. In a simple rank system (see Chart 1) everything would just get dropped one place Chart 4).

Steve could probably quiet his conscience with this logic. “It’s not that bad. My wife is still second. My kids are still third. How far off can I be?” We could answer Steve many ways, but let’s keep looking at the concept of priorities. If we walked Steve though a value scoring system (see Chart 3), he would see the reality of his sin much clearer (Chart 5).

Gambling must accumulate the required number of value points in order to become number one. For example, if he wants to play a casino game like www.oxi.casino, the value dots for that must be greater than the value points for the other things listed. This significantly shuffles all the other numbers. Work also jumps because of the increased need for money. The kids take priority over the wife, because she “nags” about money and housework. We can begin to see the mess sin makes of life even before the life altering consequences of sin begin to emerge. It makes sense why the two Great Commandments (Matthew 22:37-40) are commands of priority (love), not prohibition (thou shall not).

Second, let’s also use this concept to see perfectionism more clearly. The perfectionist can utilize the value scoring system to see reality in a different way. Let’s say Steve never started internet gambling, instead he is simply trying to earn his #1 Husband, #1 Father, #1 Employee, #1 Yard, and #1 Golfer mug all at the same time. In this case, Steve would view his “rank” score simply as a matter of order. Which relationship or activity do I master first, second, third, and fourth? He would not see his error until he created a value score (Chart 6).

If Steve cloned himself three times (equally 4 total Steves), then this chart would be great! However, Steve is faced with the reality of being a finite human bound within the restrictions of time and his current season of life. God has only called Steve to perform at the level of excellence that can be achieved in a 168 hour week (or 672 hour month) based upon Steve’s abilities, resources, season of life, and opportunities (managed within biblical priorities).

So what is our take away from this discussion of priorities?

Hopefully, we have found a way of thinking about priorities that allows us to avoid both minimizing our sin and stressing out about perfection. In addition, I hope we have gained a greater a more practical understanding of why Jesus said that all of the law and the prophets (the Bible) hangs on having our priorities (loves) in the right order. If we have done that much, we have equipped ourselves to study the Bible more practically and with a motivation of worship.

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Brad Hambrick

Brad Hambrick -
Brad serves as the Pastor of Counseling at The Summit Church inDurham, NC. He also serves as Assistant Professor of Biblical Counseling at Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary, a council member of the Biblical Counseling Coalition, has authored several books including God’s Attributes: Rest for Life’s Struggles, and served as general editor for the Becoming a Church that Cares Well for the Abused (churchcares.com) project.

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