“The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies, it comes from friends and loved ones.”
–Anonymous
When Jesus said, “He who shared my bread has turned against me” (John 13:18), he was echoing Psalm 41:9, “Even my close friend, someone I trusted, one who shared my bread, has turned against me.” Jesus, of course, was referring to Judas—Judas who had walked and ministered with him daily for several years, Judas who had sat by him and eaten many meals with him, Judas who was a close and, supposedly, trusted friend. No doubt about it, Jesus was deeply hurt by a kiss being used as a weapon of betrayal by someone so close to him.
We’ll never know exactly why Judas betrayed Jesus. The best we can do is to surmise his motives. Jesus knew that Judas would betray him, yet he didn’t treat him any differently from the other disciples. This alone makes Jesus’ extraordinary kindness toward Judas more profound. Jesus loved Judas. He didn’t ostracize him, put him down, or badmouth him to everyone and anyone who would listen. Neither do we find any, “Hah! I’ll show you. You betray me now, but I’m going to make you burn in hell for eternity!” Nor any desire for retribution.
No. There was no hurt pride, stubbornness, or mean-spiritedness in Jesus’ actions—just humility and unconditional love.
What about you? Do you find yourself walking with a “Judas”? What now?
Hard though it may be to do, Jesus tells us clearly: “Bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat [hurt] you” (Luke 6:28).
I don’t think these are just legalistic checklists on our way to heaven. They’re healing words for our sanity, our health, and our good. They keep us from replaying those piercing or cutting words and actions over and over again in our mind—until we feel like we’re going to go crazy or we break down.
Love has an unbelievable restorative power—giving it and receiving it. It is one of the greatest gifts God has given to us, and it’s free! Yet we default to anger and resentment. They’re like an addiction. But, as Jesus would have us do, when we keep on being loving and giving (not like some stalker or obsessed person from the films Sleeping with the Enemy or Fatal Attraction!), we’ll find that we become more lighthearted and fitted for the purpose for which we’ve been created.
And let’s face it. No matter how wonderful we think we are, we’re just not that good. We all fall short. There is a bit of Judas in us all. So yes, we might have been betrayed. But let’s get over it and take the high ground. If we call ourselves Christians, then what we believe should be reflected in how we treat others and in how joy-filled we are. I have seen people held captive by their anger, only to find true freedom when they finally chose to let go and entrust their hurt to God. Wouldn’t it be better not to wallow overlong in our misery and then miss out on all the fun and brilliant things around us?
So what about you? How do you face betrayal? Maybe God might have hardened someone’s heart to fulfill his best purposes for your life. Or, unlike the real Judas, God can use even the painful choices of others to weave a better purpose for your life. With God, all things are possible.
- Walking with Jesus and Judas: Dealing with Betrayal - April 1, 2026
- Annihilationism and Conditional Immortality in John’s Ancient Bibles - February 22, 2025
- Hulk’s Thanksgiving Thanks - November 28, 2019
i talk about this topic a lot, but I love the way you linked Jesus’ treatment of Judas with how we should handle it. I hadn’t thought about that before. I also love the freedom you share. Great piece.
Hi Jill,
Thanks!! Really appreciate your encouraging words. I’ve learned the hard way, but the lesson has stuck so far…it’s much more fun to love (obviously with the help of the Holy Spirit and God’s grace), than to expend my energy in being resentful and angry.
Awesome insights. It is very hard to go the Christ way of forgiving and moving on, but once we do – what peace! Better than letting it fester and turn you into a hard, bitter person. Imagine what the world would be like if we lived in love! A wonderful 2015 to you and may you reach many with your inspiring words. Blessings!
Thanks Tricia! Unfortunately, some prefer to retain resentment and anger, they find it more difficult to forgive and move on. I agree with you, what peace and joy when we do forgive and trust God’s healing power.
A pastor gave me this piece of advice…You can’t let selfish or disordered personalities feed off of your conscience. they’re quick to detect the self-sacrificing and the humble and will exploit them to the fullest.
Thanks Stacey!
This is one of those pieces of advice that I wished I had received years ago. Not that I consider myself the most humble or self-sacrificing, but this would have saved me many instances of pain, feeling guilty, blaming myself, or giving in to the pressure of “doing the right thing.” How does one do the right thing for someone who is incapable of being a normal, decent human being—either through their life choices or a genuine disorder?
As Christians (and often, members of a church), we tend to forget that selfish and disordered Christians may be used by the Father of Lies and Distortion. I know when I say that, it offends some, but it is the truth. I also see this happening so often in the lives of pastors. “Good” pillars of the church, either members or other pastors, use their authority to denigrate the pastor. The end result being that many pastors today are being forced out of their churches. I hope more people wake up to this truth.
Hope 2015 is one of your happiest yet!
This is an awesome powerful message.Unless we hand our hurt over to the Lord we will die with it festering in our hearts. We praise God for we can forgive. I have never really understood why Judas betrayed Jesus and yet the kindness showed by our Lord. Its an old story but so relevant we pass it by in our Bibles year after year. Yet God can one day show us just why it happened. I refuse to be belittled or hurt because I too as you have mentioned have handed the hurt over to the Lord. Freedom is our to choose in our Saviour’s love for us. God Bless and thank you for this wonderful note for 2015
Hi Patricia,
Thank you for your great insights and encouraging words. It’s always a mystery to me how people who can quote the Bible (or powerfully exegete every passage in Scripture) can harbour so much unkindness and unforgiveness in their hearts. You’re right unless we hand over our hurt or our anger to God, the only person we really damage is ourself. What fun is that?
May 2015 be filled with God’s love and blessings!
This is my new favorite of yours. Great writing!!! Certainly ministered to me!!! Thank you!! 😀
Hi Eric!
Thanks!! So glad it did. Hope 2015 is the best, most blessed year yet!!! 🙂