Q. I’m tired of dealing with negative people. How can I not let their behavior affect me?
So you’ve met Negative Nelly or Bitter Betty, have you? To my chagrin, I’m all-too-well acquainted with them! And believe you me, they sometimes really get under my skin.
Chronic negativity and bitterness are like malignant tumors that grow out of control—their cancerous cells metastasizing throughout our whole being and infiltrating our very souls. They can also poison those around us. It’s not pretty!
These spiritual sicknesses cause us to think and behave in unhealthy and unholy ways. Moreover, these detrimental and destructive attitudes are responsible for injuring others. But, sadly enough, in the end, they ultimately hurt us more than anyone else. It’s a matter of self-inflicted misery.
Do you have a tendency to view the world through tainted lenses? It may just be your natural personality bent, but we often learn this unwholesome attitude from our family-of-origin and/or friends. The glass is perpetually half-empty. Constant negativity may be symptomatic of faithlessness. At the very least, it’s stinkin’ thinkin’!
The apostle Paul encourages us to engage in positive and optimistic thinking instead. He says,
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.
-Philippians 4:8 (ESV).
Bitterness, on the other hand, stems from envy, unforgiveness, resentment, and a basic lack of love. It causes us to despise—even hate—others and wish evil on them. Its toxic presence results in us becoming sour and cynical, angry and acrimonious. Bitterness eats us up from the inside out.
Hebrews 12:14-15 (ESV) says,
Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no ‘root of bitterness’ springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled.
We can either choose to become bitter or better. Let’s replace negativity and bitterness with faith and love.
-Photo by manu schwendener on Unsplash
- Depression and the Holidays - December 6, 2023
- Cancer of the Soul: Negative Nelly Meets Bitter Betty - September 24, 2021
- Blue Alert: The Depression Epidemic - May 29, 2019
I agree with your thoughts. I am constantly fighting the negativity bug in my own life. It is difficult, but I know the happiness bug makes me a better person. When I look for the bad in others, I can find it. But when I look for the good, I can find that, also. The challenge is remembering which I should seek!